These Things Bug Me!

     They might just be expressions, but the truth behind them are the kinds of things that make me run in tight little circles with my hands shaking fast in front of me while chanting "eww eww eww EWWWW!".

     "Nit Picking"- this does not mean that someone is picking on your knitting abilities or your sweater choices... it literally means picking lice eggs off of someone!  It means that someone is going to enter your personal space so much that they will be inspecting you at very close range for the tiniest little flaw and EXPECTING to find fault with you.  BUT!!! What it really means is that they expect that your side of an issue or idea is so flawed that it is "unclean" and filled with vermin that they will have to point out and remove.

     "Put a Bug in Your Ear"- Anyone who has ever had a bug in their ear can tell you (I have not had this happen, but I have seen it on TV) that not only is it painful but it is also impossible to think of anything else.  Those little buggy legs and feet stomping around in a sensitive ear canal as it struggles to turn around and get out, the ear canal swelling from the irritation making it even harder.  When someone says they are going to "put a bug in your ear" it means that they want you to think of nothing else and for it to 'pain' you until you can do something about it.

     "Cooties"- Guess what 'cooties' are?  LICE!  What is this obsession with lice???  When little boys and girls in the schoolyard say "eww, boys/girls have cooties" they are basically calling each other unclean.  (Okay, no huge shocker there)  What is shocking is that there is a children's game by this name and even an online version that can be found where the object of the game is to be the first to put together your bug and get cooties!  

     Just what is the obsession with lice and either wanting to pick them off people or be the first to have them?

     Just where might this idea that blood sucking vermin could be endearing have come from?

     I have an idea... and it just might shock you!

     During the Renaissance in France "some Frenchmen would pluck fleas from their lovers’ flesh and keep the insects as pets—it was a way to have a small piece of their beloved with them always. The fleas lived in tiny gold cages worn around the neck and were fed a daily meal of the man’s blood." The thought behind this being that their blood was now 'co-mingling' and that the flea represented their love.

     I am sorry, but no matter how cute you make lice or romantic you make a flea they will always be vermin... pests... unclean... annoying.

    Now everyone join me in the "ewww" dance... it is easy-- simply stand up, bend your arms and hold your hands at chest height close to your body and start shaking them very fast then run in little circles (or spin) and chant "eww eww eww EWWWW!".

      

Amish Mafia???

   Just when you think that the different cable channels have shown you every aspect of Amish life you can think of they manage to come up with another that I thought was just a joke.  

     Heck, it was and is a joke that I like to tell...

     "How can you tell the Amish Mafia is after you?"

     "You wake up one morning with a barn in your yard and a very angry quilt on the bed next to you!"

     It seems, however, that the Discovery Channel has found an "Amish Mafia" in Lancaster, PA and have decided to put it through the 'reality show' grist mill for the entertainment and titillation of the American viewing public.

    This Mafia is presumed to be the "Amish Police" and their job is to keep the Amish in line and walking the straight and narrow... the only problem is... the Amish have never heard of them and neither has anyone who has ever grown up near the Amish.

     It only makes, sense, though... after all, we hear all the time about the high speed buggy chases that happen with guns blazing after a corn husking gone bad.  (Insert sarcasm and stir  then bake at 350 for twenty minutes, sheesh people... no, this does not happen!)

     If there WAS an Amish Mafia keeping them all in line then there would be no Rumspringa (running around years when the Amish youth experience the "English" modern world before joining the Church and giving up such things) and those that left the Amish would go into hiding and not on cable reality shows talking about how they left.

    They would go into hiding... though... since the Amish do not have television sets in their homes or the internet I guess the case could be made that they were safe on TV because they would never be seen.  It is not like any neighbors that are not Amish would *ever* tell their Amish neighbors about what they saw on TV. (Yes, more sarcasm... )

     On an unrelated note... I awoke this morning to find this lovely gift on my bed next to me!

     It has such lovely tiny hand stitching... and just look at that happy smile!

     I guess we will just have to wait until December to see what the Discovery Channel has come up with that they can call an "Amish Mafia", but as for this dedicated Blogger... I am just not buying it!

     

Why I Read Books and Not Screens

     As a dedicated bibliophile I feel the need to explain why I feel that a book will always be superior to an e-reader.

     There is something about holding a book in your hands as you curl up with it on a rainy afternoon with a nice warm drink at your side that cannot be replicated with a digital device. The world outside grey and subdued, rain tracing crystalline tears down the windowpane as you escape to another world... only the rustle of paper as you turn the page invading your peace.  It is that rustle of paper that lets you know that the story continues... you can tell how far you have come in the story and how far you have to go as the weight of the pages slowly transfer sheet by sheet from one palm to the other.

     Buying a book is a personal experience... you go to the store and look at the vast array of titles, the covers bright and inviting as they vie for your attention.  Names of the story tellers old friends that invite you to come back and listen to another delightful tale... new names shy as they beckon you over to introduce yourself to their world.  You pick up books, hefting their size in your hand while inspecting them and looking at the back to see if this is the adventure you want today, often finding many that you would like to take and slowly narrowing down your choices.  You make selections to take home today as a mental list builds of the others you will come back for, knowing they will be waiting for you.

     An e-reader does not give you this... instead it is cold and impersonal as you look over a list of names and titles... it does not encourage you to try something new and expand your vision of the world but instead subtly directs you towards suggestions based on what you have already read.  

     One you buy a book it is yours and unless you give it away it always will be yours.  You can throw it, drop it, step on it and even read it in the bathtub because if you were to drop it in the water all you would need to do is set it aside and let it dry before you go back to reading it.

     Books pass through hands... from the moment they are created, that birth of imagination from the writer, they pass through hands to you and beyond.  People work at the printing facilities, drivers carry the books to distributors, people place them on the shelf, a cashier trades you an escape of imagination for a little money and when you are done you pass it on to another.  These are real people that make their living bringing books to you... with an e-reader these people are left out of the loop and losing their jobs.

     Every hand that touches a book leaves a story of their own behind... and one of my favorite places to purchase a book is a charity thrift store because I know that the money I spend there will go to help someone.   Okay, I also love buying books there because I can get a ton of books cheap, lol.

     I love going to the Library and checking out books to read as well... these books have passed from hand to hand in an endless cycle and sometimes I wonder what things these books have seen.  They have been carried by women that do not know that tonight the man they love will ask them to marry them... held by a person on their last day on earth before they head off to the store and meet up with a drunk driver... read to a child who misses their father deployed overseas and comforted someone in the hospital as they wait to go home.  These books give an escape to everyone that touches them, every escape just a little different as that person sees the story tinged with their own life experiences.

     At the end of the day, I will lay down with a book... the world at slumber outside of my walls as I slowly turn the pages until I grow weary and fold down a corner of a page and set he book aside until tomorrow when I can instantly slip into that alternate universe and continue my journey.

     No e-reader can give me these things nor can it touch so many lives.

     Oh, and if stuck on a deserted island a book can double as toilet paper! (Hey, did you honestly think I could keep all snark out of this post?)

       

     

Crazies Unite to Un-Unite!

     There is a new movement that has taken idiotic storm... 

     In an earlier post I wrote about how there were petitions at WhiteHouse.GOV made by people asking for their States to be allowed to secede from the United States of America because they are upset that a legal election happened and their political party lost.

     The number of States with petitions has increased to 22... making me wonder how long it will be until every State is listed by people who lose an election as gracefully as a spoiled 10 year old looses a game of Monopoly!

     I have an idea for a new petition and wonder if I were to create it at WhiteHouse.GOV in the "We the People" petitions area just how many signatures it would get.

     My idea... "Petition to request mental evaluations on those petitioning to Secede from the United States of America"!

     I am sorry (okay, I am not one bit sorry) but losing an election is not a valid reason for wanting to leave a country you claim to love.  The same people who have posted these idiotic waste of time (though amusing to those with rational thought) were the ones who considered themselves to be the new "Tea Party"and claimed to be "true Americans" and patriots.

     They are now proving their absolute patriotism by wanting to leave the very country that they rabidly declared to love, with hand over heart screaming the 'Pledge of Allegiance' and calling anyone that did not flock to Fox News in droves and drink the Conservative Crazy Kool-Aid (now in Patriotic Punch!) a socialist communist traitor.

     It really does boggle the mind just how they jump from declaring to be a 'true patriot' to wanting to expatriate simply because the Democratic process the United States of America allows people to vote with majority rule deciding who will hold the office of President every four years and the person they were told would win by the only 'news' (and I use that term lightly) agency they watched did not win.

     I think the truth of the matter is that we have witnessed the true Zombie Apocalypse... people allowed their minds to be taken over by a single source of information and became mindless drones repeating whatever their ideologue told them to and like a cult drank their Kool-Aid.  They sat waiting for the election like cultists waiting for a comet to come and take them to a wonderful new world.  When the comet never arrived they were bitter and needed to lash out, so they raced to their creator and bowed to the network talking heads awaiting their new instructions.

     Instead of blaming their news source for passing on skewed polls and false information as fact they decided that the Nation itself was in the wrong and they no longer wanted any part of it.  Had they bothered to view any other source of information they would have realized that there was a chance they could lose the election... but they were told not to watch or listen to anything not Fox approved and like good little Zombies they obeyed.

     

Pheochromocytoma- Monday Zebra

Condition- Pheochromocytoma

Pronunciation- fee-oh-crow-moe-sigh-tow-mah

Rarity- Very Rare

Difficulty in Diagnosis- mixed, while there is a test to diagnose this condition, finding a doctor that will know to test for it can be difficult.

     Pheochromocytoma is a rare endocrine tumor that is usually located on the adrenal gland (the adrenal glands are located on the kidneys) and are often referred to as "micro tumors" because they tend to be very small, though their impact can be startling because they release adrenal hormones and can cause dramatic symptoms.

     The symptoms of Pheochromocytoma can mimic many other conditions and for that reason can be very difficult to get a diagnoses because, as the saying goes, when looking for horses no one ever looks for a zebra.  Basically, this means that Physicians will often test for and treat the symptoms of the disease because often the most common cause is the correct one.

     It is only when symptoms intensify and do not respond to conventional treatment that a Physician might consider looking at the more rare conditions... but even then there are so many conditions that cause the same symptoms that it is like trying to find a needle in a haystack of possible ailments.

     The symptoms of Pheochromocytoma are-

• Excessive Sweating
• High blood pressure- uncontrollable high blood pressure and hypertensive crisis
• Rapid heart rate- also known as tachycardia
• Forceful heartbeat
• Profound sweating
• Abdominal pain
• Sudden-onset headaches - usually severe and of varying duration
• Anxiety
• Sudden uncontrollable rage
• Feeling of extreme fright
• Pale skin
• Weight loss

     If a pheochromocytoma tumor is suspected the first test that will be given is a 24 hour urine test which will check for certain hormones released by the adrenal glands.   If this test comes back elevated the next test to be done would be a specialized scan to locate the tumors.  The most common place for them is on the adrenal glands, but they are not ALWAYS located there and because of the size of them (as stated before, they are micro-tumors for the most part) they can be very hard to find.

     The only 100% reliable treatment for a pheochromocytoma tumor is to remove it, because it will constantly release hormones and the symptoms can be very hard to manage with traditional medications or can be impossible to manage.

     Surgery to remove these tumors must be done with great care by a specialist because anesthesia issues can be common and blood pressure can go into hypertensive crisis even under anesthesia.

     There are many good websites for more information about this condition such as the one by the Mayo Clinic where you can find out more... but here are some interesting facts about this disease.

• Most people are diagnosed with a pheochromocytoma between the ages of 30 and 50.  Though it can happen at any age it is even more rare in those younger than 30 years of age.
• Most pheochromocytoma tumors are actually found in autopsy!
• Eating foods or drinking beverages with vanilla in them can affect the 24 hour urine test!
• Most pheochromocytoma are benign
• It can be hereditary 
• There could be a single tumor on one adrenal gland, one on both or they could actually be anywhere in the body but will still release adrenal hormones no matter where they are.

     Thus ends the first of what I hope to be many "Monday Zebra" posts about Rare and/or Incurable Conditions.  Keep an eye out every Monday as I highlight another condition to help spread the word about the world of rare conditions out there.

     If you have or know someone that has a Rare and/or Incurable Condition that you would like to see featured, please contact me and I will add it to the list of conditions that will be brought forth into the Snarky light every Monday.

Instigating for a Cause

     I enjoy a good bout of instigating... the act of getting an idea out there and watching as others take the idea and run with it.  Usually then things are instigated it is a bad thing, but this will definitely be for a good cause... or causes as the case may be.

     I have decided that every Monday there would be a post about Rare and/or Incurable Conditions that have little awareness... my way of not only offering a little education about some very fascinating conditions but also giving voice to those that suffer.

     Many of the posts will be done by me, but every once in a while I will invite a guest blogger to give their first hand experience about their life with the condition to which I will add links on medical information, testing procedures and more.

     This will also give any readers that wish to chime in a chance to share their own story and life experience because I will ask from time to time for volunteers to step forward and put a face to the conditions and will welcome suggestions.

      The first "Zebra Monday" post will be coming later today... so keep an eye out because this one will be a dozy... hard to pronounce and harder to find this condition will amaze you and hopefully the post educate you.

For the Price of Pizza a life was lost...

     I find it mind boggling that the battle cry against offering insurance to workers has switched from "those lazy bums" to "The Pizza!!! Think of the Pizza!!!"

     The founder of 'Papa John's Pizza" is reported to be standing strong on the stance that having employees with Insurance would do the following horrible things-

• Raise the cost of a large pizza by an average of 14 cents...

     NOOO!!!

     Say it isn't so!

     Not 14 cents!!!

     Wait a second....

     That is roughly 1/3 of the price of adding extra pepperoni to that same pizza!

     Those lazy workers who are slaving away so that I can pick up a quick meal for my family because I am feeling too lazy to cook are trying to steal a third of my pepperoni!

     Quick!  Call the Tea Party!!!

     It is "PepperoniGate"!!!

     Over-reacting much?

     Let us think about those who are most likely to be uninsured in America... the food service workers.

     These are the people that handle and prepare the food that we place in our bodies... the people we trust not to poison us on a regular basis as we pull up to a drive-thru window and get our 'super-size' on.

     One would think that we would want the people handling our food and those kids meals that are half eaten and half buried in the back seat (my belief is that our children are storing chicken parts in the car hoping that they will turn to carbon and can be processed into oil when they are adults, but that topic is for another time) to be healthy and non-disease carrying individuals.  

     Is that an allergy?  A cold?  The flu?  Who knows... because they cannot afford to take off of work to go have it checked out and no insurance to see a Doctor to make sure.  Instead they are behind the counter passively passing on who knows what to your burger... do you want fries with that?

     That person at the bread factory who is working three jobs and still has no insurance because no one wants to hire for full time work could have diabetes... or maybe it is hepatitis.  

     The cashier that hears you ranting about the price of the steaks you are buying going up and how the person before you used food stamps to buy cookies has had a headache for a week now and only nods because she knows that her family only eats thanks to food stamps and even her kids deserve an occasional treat.

     Yeah... that 14 cents is a real deal breaker.